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    New Year New Goals is DUMB

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    Joshua Greene
    I wrote an article for one of my Forever Young Lifestyle Brand’s BFY Life about setting goals and how most American’s who make resolutions for the New Year end up failing within the first two months.  
     
    What I wrote about was making SMART goals (minus the R).  This is the method I use for making my goals and using micro goals to help keep me on track as well making sure my goals become attainable.   If you are not sure what a SMART goal is or what micro goals are check out the article.  I’ve also written about making goals previously.
     
    I also mentioned why I think waiting for Monday, a new month, or new year almost ensures you are going to fail, and the best time to start is now.  Check it out, and let me know what you think.
     
    Happy New Year,
    jr

    Range: Why Generalists Triumph in a Specialized World

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    Joshua Greene

    About the Book (from Epstein’s Website):

    Plenty of experts argue that anyone who wants to develop a skill, play an instrument, or lead their field should start early, focus intensely, and rack up as many hours of deliberate practice as possible. If you dabble or delay, you’ll never catch up to the people who got a head start. But a closer look at research on the world’s top performers, from professional athletes to Nobel laureates, shows that early specialization is the exception, not the rule.
    David Epstein examined the world’s most successful athletes, artists, musicians, inventors, forecasters and scientists. He discovered that in most fields—especially those that are complex and unpredictable—generalists, not specialists, are primed to excel. Generalists often find their path late, and they juggle many interests rather than focusing on one. They’re also more creative, more agile, and able to make connections their more specialized peers can’t see.
    Provocative, rigorous, and engrossing, Range makes a compelling case for actively cultivating inefficiency. Failing a test is the best way to learn. Frequent quitters end up with the most fulfilling careers. The most impactful inventors cross domains rather than deepening their knowledge in a single area. As experts silo themselves further while computers master more of the skills once reserved for highly focused humans, people who think broadly and embrace diverse experiences and perspectives will increasingly thrive.
     

    My Review:

     
    I also hear from a lot of people focus on one thing, do one thing well before moving on to the the next business or project.  That doesn’t work well for me.  When you are thinking about a million different things at the same time.  I feel the best time to execute is now.  So for me personally I work on one business or project until I come to a natural stopping point.  This might be at 10 in the morning, so does that mean I should just pack up my bag head home and have a serious NCIS marathon binge?  Of course not, I start working on another business or project until I get to a stopping point or have to stop for the day.  And that pattern continues. While most of what I do is electronic based, there are some differences in each business that help me compliment other businesses I have.  So by me having “range” I’m able to learn and do more by not have that tiger mom focus that everyone thinks you need to have.  
     
    In the beginning of the book Epstein talks about how those who have become number one in their fields did not necessarily have tiger mom focus. Some did but other didn’t, there was no data pointing one way or another.  Those who had diversity in their upbringing had just of good of a change to be number one in their field as those who had a tiger mom work ethic.  
     
    One of my favorite parts of the book was when they discussed the NASA thought process on how had they had “range” in there collection of data, and how they made decisions lives could have been saved.  (I will leave it at that, so I don’t ruin anything in the book).  No spoilers here!  
     
    The book is quick read (or listen) I finished it in ten days, but could have been sooner.  I think this is a great book for those who want to review other ways of doing things than those who feel you need to only focus on one thing if you want to be great.  
     
     

    Don’t Kill The Relationship

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    Josh Greene
    How many times have you been in a heated discussion with a partner and you’ve said some things that you probably wish you hadn’t, or did something you could not take back?  This is reacting to a situation and not responding.  Reptiles do this as well, as they do not know any better.  
     
    A couple weeks ago I was at a concert and I was texting someone and all of sudden the conversation had a changed demeanor and I did not like where it was going and I reacted poorly.   My thoughts were, I could not believe this person was saying the things that were being said to me, how did this conversation get so far off course.  And now I’m going to be as mean as I can.  
     
    So as I’m known to do, I reacted, and by reacting I really mean I over reacted, and the next day, when I got more of an explanation of events that lead to their thinking and found out there may have been some alcohol involved, it started to make sense.  At this point I finally understood the difference of responding vs reacting.  Reacting is doing something in the heat of the moment, and not thinking clearly or as thoughtful as you normally would.   Responding is listening to what is being said, understanding it, thinking about, and then well responding.    
     
    Like everyone else when I get upset about something this is how I go, i go nuclear on everyone, which is not healthy for building relationships or for progress.   I’ve learn over the past few weeks.  I was having another difficult conversation, and my first thought was to get defensive and react.  But I stayed quiet listen to what they were saying, and then I developed my response, and it was a positive conversation.  Now the other party probably wanted to hear something sooner than I was able too, but the topic was sprung on me so I need time to process what I was thinking.    
     
    My suggestion on working on this, is to first remember you don’t have to be quick to respond to anyone.  Let your thoughts develop.  Most other people you come in contact with are not purposely trying to hurt or upset you, so show some grace to them as to what they are trying to do.  They are trying to have a tough conversation with you, and it is probably something that don’t want to do as much as you don’t want to hear it.  But this is life and sometimes you have to have a hard conversation.  
     
    Think about what was said, process your thoughts and then respond.  Don’t skip that middle part, process your thoughts.  If not all you are doing is making a tough conversation even tougher.    There have been many times I’ve skipped that middle section only to say some of the most hateful, mean spirited stuff you could think off.  All that does is ruin relationships.    The event I talked about early at the concert, the next day when we talked, I couldn’t even look at this person, I had thought it was from me still being upset at what they had said to me, but it was in fact i was so embarrassed by what I said, and that was why i couldn’t look at them.